F&B2017B Levels of Psychoanalytic Interpretation
Learning to recognize mama's sons: we learn the characteristics of eternal boys
Have you heard of such a category of men as sissy ? Many have heard of him, but not all women know who they are and how they differ from other men. If you are still looking for a suitable candidate for your husband or you have a small son, learn how to recognize a mama's son and not turn your child into him!
How to recognize a mama's boy?
Many girls often hear advice from older friends: Never associate life with this type of man who is attached to his mother . This is how you can briefly describe the mother's son.
At their core, these are young people in whom a psychological separation from their mother did not occur in adolescence. Without this very dear person, such men, regardless of their age, cannot exist.
It is very difficult to build a relationship with a man belonging to this type, not every woman can even be in his company for a long time. When the husband is a mama's boy, there can be no question of a happy marriage. In order not to ruin your life, learn how to recognize this type of men in time!
These signs of a mama's boy will help you recognize him at the dawn of a relationship:
- Avoids making any decisions. You should be alerted that a young man always leaves the choice up to you. He refuses to participate in making the simplest decisions, even such as choosing a movie to watch together or booking a restaurant table;
- At each meeting he talks about his mother, admires her, compares you to her. If you do not want to become a participant in constant competition with a woman who could not properly raise her son, as soon as you hear similar phrases from your chosen one: You are almost like my mother , And my mom doesn't do it the way you do , run away from him;
- He is already over 30, but he continues to live with his parents. It is very difficult for a guy brought up according to the principle of mama's son to leave his parents' house, because, in fact, he cannot even do a lot on his own. Mom prepares him to eat, does laundry, ironing, sometimes even helps him dress, no matter how ridiculous it sounds, but the life of a young man, overly patronized by his mother, looks just like that. If a man lives with his parents, this should always be alarming, because after the wedding, youm, too, most likely will have to settle in their house;
- A man's whole life is under the control of his mother. The mama's son's psychology is such that he allows his mother to control himself in everything. A woman takes an active part in all spheres of her child's life, up to the choice of a bride. That is why the girl of such a young man should like, first of all, his mother, and only then he. It is very difficult to build a personal life in such conditions, many marriages break up sooner or later;
- Not adapted to life at all. Not every man is well versed in technology, knows how to make repairs in the house with his own hands, but in any case, he should be able to hammer in nails and screw in a light bulb. If your chosen one is unable to do this, you have a typical mama's son.
When starting a new relationship, take a close look at your boyfriend to see if he has signs of excessive parenting from his mother.
Looking for a way out of the situation
Among mature men, it is very easy to recognize this type of parenting, when the mother plays a decisive role in the family.
But the girls who decide to tie their fate with their peers, who are just over 20 years old, it is quite difficult to expose such a young man.
Many people manage to learn about this already during their life together. What if your husband is a mama's boy?
The problem of these guys is their emotional and psychological immaturity, according to psychologists, it is almost impossible to re-educate them. The fact is that their psychology is as follows: for the rest of their lives they remain small children in need of someone's care. When you get married and find that your husband is a mama's boy, the advice of a psychologist can help make him a real man.
Listen to these experts' recommendations:
- Persistently train your husband to be independent. Let this process be slow, but be focused to the end. Give him the simplest assignments - let him take out the trash, buy food, pick up the child from kindergarten;
- Praise your husband whenever possible. Praise is considered a good incentive for further achievements, your admiration for your loved one will give him confidence in his abilities;
- Do your best to befriend his mom. Unfortunately, friendship between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law is not always possible, but try to show this woman that you care about her son, let her be confident: her boy is in good hands. Another way to win your mother-in-law's sympathy is to show her that you admire her as a hostess and don't even intend to compete with her. Seeing her superiority over you, this woman is unlikely to want to come into conflict with you.
Such simple tips, with a strong desire, can help a woman raise real men from her husbandat. However, this will take a long time.
It's much easier if the man himself is interested in how to stop being a mama's boy.
You should know that many women like to be the wives of mama's sons, the role of a mother in marriage can be chosen by those individuals who want to lead their husband everywhere and always.
How to raise a real man
If you are panicky afraid that an insecure man may grow out of your child, tied to your skirt, seek the help of a psychologist. A specialist will point you to the typical mistakes mothers make in raising boys and help you avoid them.
Psychologists say that most often such dependent and indecisive men grow up in a family where there are no other children besides them, and it is the mother who decides all important issues. Such boys develop self-doubt and an inability to make independent decisions as a result of maternal overprotection.
If you are wondering how not to raise a mama's boy out of your child, teach him to be independent from childhood. Make it clear to the boy that he and his mother are two different people.
First of all, he should sleep in a separate bed, and if possible, have his own room.
When a child grows up, he should make friends with whom he will spend his free time, and not sit at home with his mother watching TV series. He must independently make decisions and be responsible for them. For example, I decided not to clean the room - you are left without dessert!
You must understand that you have a responsible task - to bring up an initiative, self-confident and purposeful young man!